An Open Letter to My New Neighbor Who Yells at People Who Is No Longer My Neighbor Because He Yelled at Too Many People and Was Likely Evicted

By Jeffrey Pillow on February 28, 2019 — 2 mins read

You yell a lot — like a lot, lot. And generally speaking, we’re not used to that here. Sure, sometimes neighbors who are parents have to raise their voices at their kids who are running around like maniacs, because that’s what kids do and parents sometimes do in response.

But you yell at adults, at not just adults in your own house. You do that, too. You also yell at adults who are strangers to you. When these strangers live in your neighborhood, they are known as your neighbors.

For example, the friendly lady walking her shih tzu who I often speak to in passing while walking my own dog. I was outside playing with my kids when she walked by my house, then yours.

My dog barked as is customary for dogs to do when another dog walks in front of their house. Except your dog, which is large and was freely roaming the neighborhood which is against HOA policy, ran up to her dog and began growling. So, being that her dog is small and on a leash, this lady politely asked if you could get your dog and put it in the house. Instead of being nice about it, you went on a tirade and began yelling at her.

The next day, in what appeared at first to be a friendly conversation between you and the fire chief, ended with you yelling at the fire chief while he was washing his car, as you stormed off and then slammed your front door.

The next day, you yelled at a woman as she ran out of your house and got in her car and high tailed it out of there. Then you got in your car and drove after her.

The next day, the police came, and you said, “You’ve got to be f—king kidding me!” After the police left, you yelled at another neighbor on the street. And, the police came back.

The next day, you yelled at someone else, and I said to my wife as my kids were playing in the front yard, that if he yells at me “I’ll knock that motherf—ker out,” and my wife said, “Please, don’t.”

The next day, a moving van was at your house. The next day you were gone, presumably from being evicted due to you yelling at everyone on the street.

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Posted in: Humor

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  • It’s so sad that some people are so miserable! I think everyone has had a wonderful neighbor like this one! Love your stories!

    • Ha, yeah. I mean this dude had problems. Everything would seem fine, then all of a sudden he’d start yelling at people. Nice people too. In a way it made the street more interesting. It was only a matter of time before he was going to get booted. I would have guessed a month, but he didn’t quite make that.

    • Just a smidgen. The most humorous part of it all, at least for me, was that he drove a Mini Cooper. When I think of someone with severe anger issues, I wouldn’t peg them as the owner of a Mini Cooper.